What Sarge said. Just because a word is said without a specific, malicious intent, the word 'Rape' is the perfect summation of exactly how sexism is utterly pervasive in the gaming community.

Of course the huge majority of guys that play online are not likely to enact Rape in real life, but do you think this word would be acceptable in a community in which Women had an equal stake, both in its historic development and its future?

Not a chance.

Is sexual harassment a part of the culture then? Yes it is. Whether its intentional harassment because guys fawn after the girls, or whether its unintentional, peripheral harassment through the use of the horrible language that gets used, its still not conducive to a comfortable place for women in my view.

Spot on SHP.

What is it with 'R' words and the internet/gaming community?

When people use either 'Rape' or 'Retard' in a game like TF2 it makes me so sad. There'll be someone putting up with these remarks with gritted teeth who has either been raped, knows someone who's been raped, has a relative with a learning disability etc etc. It's horrible really when you think about it.

That said one of the reasons I like the HH so much is that there's actually very little abusive language on the servers. Also having discussions like this in such an honest and mature way is pretty rare.

I remember clearly the times when I have heard abusive language during a TF2 game. The first time I wasn't an admin but I reported the player, the second time I was an admin and I kicked the reg using abusive language..... he was VERY unhappy. Still, he did shut up. I'd like to see other admins do the same too.

Regarding to your point about the use of the word 'retard', Vickery, I quote Ricky Gervais:

"Mong means downs about as much as gay means happy."

Clearly, parallels can be drawn, and when words get used in a certain context enough, their meaning does change. Though it's only the implied meaning that changes, it's the implied meaning that people respond to.

Now, I don't endorse the culture of abuse in online gaming but someone had to provide the other perspective above.

Yes, insults is a common norm in the online gaming community. It doesn't make it alright but it really depends on the context and purpose. Sometimes it's just in good fun or just a way to quickly let off some steam rather than actual harassment.

However, women are treated waaaaay differently and often has to put up with actual harassment (as the article shows). I really would be as bad if the insults towards women were the same as to men but alas, it is not. It also tends to go beyond the game as well, with people adding or messaging the female outside the game or keep on harassing during the game.

And when it comes to the "Rape" word... Well, my standpoint on the matter is that it's not any worse than any other insult. Yes, I know there's rape victims, I live in Sweden, rape is srs business here up to the point were innocent people can get convicted with little to no evidence. Anyway, do we REALLY do women any favors in the long run if we keep on assuming that females are some sorts of weakminded creatures that can't handle even seeing the word itself? Aren't we even contributing in making women "Weaker" and possibly more emotionally sensitive by coddling them? Furthermore, should we really be assuming that only females are rape victims?

I know perfectly well that rape, as many other raw, violent acts can be, can be traumatizing and I think giving support is very important. I do however think that we should be focusing on helping them get over their trauma and I do not think that removing EVERYTHING that can POSSIBLY remind them of their trauma will really help them get over it. And perhaps we should discuss why male rape victims seems to be less likely to react so violently towards anything reminding them of their trauma. Are they simply hiding it or is it the way men are brought up that helps them get over their trauma?

Also, why are like, 90% of all the submissions on http://fatuglyorslutty.com from X-box 360?

it's interesting to see that you guys can be bothered to talk about it....

as a woman player, I've been met with copious amounts of sexism throughout my 10 year gaming "career" . The HH is the only place that seems to be more accepting, which is why I'm still here. I'm fed up hearing the proverbial "there are no girls on the interwebs, you must be a boy" from 13 year-old hormonal boys.... (yes, they too are hormonal....). They presently shut up when I use voice com (if TF2), only to resume with an even more embarrassing concatenation of expletives....Sometimes they ragequit when I'm ace player and have knifed them more times than their frail ego can handle in BFBC2 ... Oh but then, I MUST be a guy, right?... BOOHOOO cry some more.
to them I say: GROW UP... YOU TOO HAVE A MOTHER.

I will agree that anonymity makes people bolder, but at the end of the day, there's no need for abuse toward others.

Efrath, the fact you've made that post demonstrates you don't actually understand the issue very well.

Using - or more specifically not using - the word Rape is NOT about 'Coddling' women. It's not about making them weaker. It's not about protecting the womenfolk from bad words.

It's about giving them some fucking respect.

It's not about the women, it's about the MEN. It's about MEN understanding that IT'S NOT OK TO TALK ABOUT RAPE AS IF IT'S TRIVIAL!

Most Women will already understand that!

Rape is historically one of the most potent and terrible weapons used by a hostile force to subjugate a peoples. It still happens now. And that's on a macro level. On a personal level I really don't think you truly understand HOW traumatizing it is - not CAN be. IS. Some people (men and women) are able to deal with it. For others it affects them so deeply that they end up killing themselves. It's a spectrum of horror. Yes support is important, yes male rape victims need as much support, but to imply that by not talking about Rape we help people get over it is crap, and it's not the issue.

The issue is that 'normalising' Rape is to make it acceptable. To make it acceptable to talk about rape as something you do to someone else, in a game, online, or whatever, is to allow the concept of rape to seep into the cultural mindset as something that is acceptable and ok.

It's not. It's never ok. Never.

You're not coddling the womenfolks because they're too frail to look after themselves. You're making it clear to the menfolks that rape is fucking bad fucking horrible and anyone who thinks it's ok deserves to be strung up by their bollocks and beaten by angry feminists until they get the fucking point.

This sort of shit makes my blood boil.

Oh, so I don't understand it because I don't agree that the word "Rape" should essentially be banned?

Tell me, why is specifically rape seemingly only word that warrants a ban of the word itself? There's many heinous crimes that traumatizes people, yet it seems that rape is the exception, the one thing where people go "Nope, we can't even say the word." I'm questioning it because it affects SO MUCH MORE than just people. It affects literature, movies, games and can, if this does keep going, most likely lead to a form of censorship.

I've seen a few fights happen between people when the word is merely mentioned or WEAKLY implied and to be honest, I think it's being blown waaaay out of proportion and I really question if it's actual victims that talks about it.

I'm gonna be honest, the matter does irritate me, because the discussion is so onesided and the "Rape culture" theory is flawed in itself with little to no evidence to back it up, it just BLOWS MY MIND as to how onesided it is and how ANYONE that disagrees with it are treated.

Also, when I said "Coddling", I was mainly referring to the sensitivity of the word itself, that we need to talk and discuss rape to make sure that it's an issue not forgotten is important.

Sarge, I'm not disagreeing that using rape as a threat should be condemned but should saying "Hah, I RAPED you there man." really receive the same type of condemnation?

If it does, I would be more worried about freedom of speech and censorship. Remember the "Dickwolves" (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2010/ ... xth-slave/) incident? Furthermore, I don't think that rape will never EVER be considered "Normal", the only times that it was considered "Normal" was when women were seen as subpar humans in the past.

As I said, I don't really believe in the theory of "Rape culture". I play violent videogames, all my friends does and NONE of us find violence to be "Normal" nor "Okay". HECK, I have not even HEARD of the term "Rape culture" in Sweden, despite the fact that they top the number of cases of rape in Europe (This essentially means that it's more common that it gets reported rather than the act itself being more common). I practically get BOMBARDED with the word and I know of NO women that reacts as if the mere mention of the word is the most horrible thing ever, and that's with 4 sisters in the family too with one of them frequently playing online (She plays Call of Duty. Yeah, guess what happens).

In short, as long as we keep on working to make sure that men and females are seen as equals, I'm certain that rape, along with other heinous acts, will never be seen as normal. The view on women, I think THAT is the core of the problem, rather than the use of the word "Rape" normalizing the act itself.

LOOOOOOONG Post!

Okay a few more points first of all rape isnt just men raping women, women rape men, men rape men, women rape women, just because you're mind might not be willing to accept that others happen doesnt mean it isnt distressing. This isnt like the british folks bringing up the war with germany, this shits still happening for one.

You could easily argue that the word murder is just as bad but its not the same context partially because the victims (I use the term victim to regard those murdered not those affected by said event) are dead, granted family or friends may be distressed but even so ALOT of games center around the very act of homocide but thats an arguement for reality vs entertainment.Perhaps, then, a more appropriate point of comparison for rape than murder would be other acts that seem to us intrinsically sinister and cruel and without plausible mitigating circumstances, such as torturing an animal.

I once read a law somewhere cant remember where it was about racism but the message stands "If someone else perceives it as offensive, whether toward them or in defence of others, then it is offensive" naturally this would pretty much kill all language as anyone could find something offensive.

I'm not even sure how some words have become so accepted as okay for joking around especially as most were used to insult not long ago, whilst writing this it occured to me that actions, or verbs such as rape will never have the same fallout of adjectives such as gay as the discriminatory party in some cases reclaim the word as a positive remark. I don't believe verbs have this fallback a rape victim would never reclaim the word rape

Knowing that casual use of the term 'rape' upsets some people, continuing to use it (without good reason and in the presence of many alternatives) thus demonstrates one's lack of regard for the feelings of others, and this lack of sociality seems a reasonable basis upon which we might regard the speaker with suspicion. Maybe many gamers whom are young have yet to learn this lesson. (bad teaching tbh)

Also this thread will naturally follow a set route, You always get at least one poster for each of the following viewpoints:

- Rape is terrible in a way that can't be joked about
- No topic is so taboo it can't be joked about
- Rape is more mentally distressing than murder
- Nothing is more mentally distressing than murder, and games depict murder all the time
- Gamers use "rape" in a cavalier and ultimately juvenile way that is offensive to victims of rape
- ...just as they use the words "faggot," "nigger," "****," and "jew"

Whilst turning a blind eye to the Internet's use of words wont achieve anything we can't censor the entire thing either. Education could be the answer but wont solve it entirely as there are probably some people who openly use these attitudes outside of the internet. sure there could be methods of detecting the use of offensive words and being sent somewhere for independent review of context but with the sheer amount that would involve no business would spend so much money on it.

LOOOOOOONG Post Over!

Efrath makes a good point. Censoring the word 'rape' won't lead us anywhere. Freedom of speech persists regardless of the context in which the word is used in. Censoring ourselves because of it MIGHT offend someone is a double edged sword which will only snowball until we can't say anything because it MIGHT offend someone. Being offended doesn't give you any rights, you don't deserve the privilege of special treatment because someone offended you. Being offended by the word 'rape' and actually being raped are two completely different things.

There is no point in hiding and cowering because of the mere mention of 'rape'. It is not a matter of normalising the word, any more than murder is being normalised. If you fear rape is being normalised, what about murder? The media, movies, television series, and games depict murder on a daily basis. I, we, kill people daily without any regard to that. What if one of those I kill experienced a family member being killed, what about their concerns? Murder is still as terrible as ever despite the constant bombardment from the media. There is no reason to believe rape is going to be accepted because children use it 'light hearted'; they are still only children. They will never understand why the word is bad, how could they? They simply can't comprehend the word.

Perhaps the increase attention to rape is because of people being more aware about themselves and reporting it more frequently, than an actual culture revolving around women, men, and children being forced into sexual intercourse against their will. The increase in rape is more likely due to an increase in cases actually being reported.

What exactly would you 'suspect' them of?

It makes sense that in an online multiplayer shooter where one is being attacked by unknown others, one is not going to take their feelings into account. It's nice when people are pleasant and sociable online, but you can't expect people to bother.


iRPAx's comparison between rape and murder is spot-on, by the way.